Wednesday, 03 December 2008
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Currently: Gold What's wrong with being alone... even if you're not really alone?
Every time I look at these blog sites, or listen to the radio, or hear someone else's problems, it always deals with relationships. After observing for quite a while, the way this society has brought us to face our lives, there is nothing deeper than getting married and procreating.
I'm sorry, but that's not all my life is about. There has to be something more. I've said that over and over again in all of my blogs, but I really do believe it. I don't believe that I was just put here to get married, have kids and serve my husband for the rest of my life. Many people feel like their biological clock is ticking or that they have to "stay on their life schedule" but in reality, who are we to say we even have a schedule.
"If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."
My schedule applies one day at a time. Again, my question doesn't ever cease to exist, like me: Why would I bring children into this world when I don't even like it? There is a blog where I wrote about this. I have to do something different, find something worth living for, worth bringing a baby into this world for. And I know it comes with love and all that. I was there, I know. But I still didn't like the world, or where I was for that matter, in order to have a child.
That's not my reason...I take that back. It's not my ONLY reason to be here.
We are a society based on relationships and sex. But how are we supposed to have great relationships to last forever ("forever") if we don't even have a relationship with ourselves half the time? What ever happened to the idea that in order to love someone else, you have to know how to love yourself? I know it's still there, but people don't love themselves enough to know what's good for them or what truth they want in their lives. That's how relationships, no matter how good they feel, fall apart. That's why there is no trust, there is no compassion or faith, the one thing that love and trust survives on, for the relationship to last longer than a few years.
When you put yourself in that situation, that's when you're the fool. And you can't help how you feel about someone, and in the same sense, Love is supposed to change you and make you better. Then what is it? People don't know how to love? They don't know how to give into love? Or do they just not fall in love anymore?
It takes time. But while I'm looking and spreading my own kind of love to the world, I suspect that someone will come along or will notice just who I am because again, I just need someone who knows the real me. For the time being, that will be under development.
Grace.
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